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Raising Kids in the Rubble of Evangelicalism

Raising Kids in the Rubble of Evangelicalism

Posted by Ingrid Schlueter in Columns, Featured Articles, Home and Family on December 29th, 2009 | Comments

Commentary by Ingrid Schlueter

How do you raise girls to be useful, Christ-centered, godly and modest in a so-called “Christian” environment that no longer values these things? Lip service is paid to “Jesus” by parents and church youth groups, but I find it heartbreaking to see a very different reality. (I have four sons, but I was thinking about daughters today…the same question applies to sons.)

As Christian parents, there are no guarantees that after instructing our children and raising them to love and fear God that they will do so. But before God we are responsible for sharing the true gospel with them and instructing them in the Scriptures so they are made fully aware of the truth. We are also responsible as parents to live it. But what saddens me is what I see among young evangelical girls who are obsessed with the latest Hollywood movies, praising movies that contain graphic immoral sexual content, (SO romantic), posting videos to groups that can only be described as evil in their worldview (Your Sweet 666?), who have no self respect in their dress or online conduct with males, who waste their lives texting gossip and foolishness, and so forth.

That secular kids live this way is hardly a shocker. But the world has so infected the church that evangelical parents are just relieved that their kids are not using drugs, jacking cars or creating babies. The bar is really that low now spiritually. So if you send your daughter off to a Christian youth group and she comes home with a Twilight henna tattoo, if her Christian school friends are chattering about a movie called “The Ugly Truth” which features graphic sex, if parents of middle schoolers are OK with her “Burnin’ Up” with the Jonas Brothers (Baby, who turned up the temperature hotter, cause I’m burnin’ up, burnin’ up for you, baby! —Christian parents, when did lust become cute?), maybe it’s time we started realizing this isn’t Christianity at all.

According to everything God commands in Scripture about purity, modesty, cleanness of speech, sloth, gossip and fear of the Lord, the current culture among kids from professing Christian homes is not remotely related to the narrow way Christ taught. Our children may ultimately reject what we teach them, but we need to immerse our young people in prayer and remain faithful as Christian parents to teach and live out for them a life that honors Christ. Jesus gave his life in agony on the cross for the things our kids are celebrating online. Something is wrong.

Listen to Crosstalk Radio Talk Show at 2pm Central today for more discussion on this theme.

  • I love your blog and think you are right to raise this important issue.
  • Totally right on! As a young knight in this present darkness, this is a huge issue with me! Now, I may not have alot of room to talk seeing as I am not married... (hehe yet), for which reason I don't have daughters, nor do I have sisters. However I DO have many sisters in Christ and when I see this all around, it drives me nuts!!! You are exactly right pointing in the direction of parents. The daughters of the Church should not be so easily sold to Vanity Fair! We are to be in this world, not of it! (John 17:14-16) For crying out loud parents! Here me! I am seeing it first hand, Satan is branding these women with the lusts of this world!!! You all must have the same devotion as Liam Neeson in Taken! Men of God, be valiant! Take your daughters and shield them from the wickedness! It is on all sides!!! Lo, in the schools, in the churches, on the TV, and in our very midst! How do you do this!? How am I going to do this with my daughters!? For one thing, I am not going to throw them into the fire like a king and his furnace! Clear hard set lines must be drawn. But the key, the heart of the issue is in explaining what godly womanhood is from Scripture! This is not an ugly thing but a very beautiful thing, like unto the aroma of a thousand roses! And just as importantly is living for Christ in your own life. You must proclaim Christ with your life, and not just your words. Live the gospel! You must remember that your home, your children are a mission field! You cannot guarantee they will be changed, that is the work of the Holy Spirit per God's Election (John 6:37). But that should be your very encouragement! That the burden of salvation does not lie on you, but is God's amazing work. However, their protection and instruction while under your care is your burden and you should take it as a sacred trust. That is why I feel homeschooling is so important in the Christian family these days. Enough said, please be encouraged by these words my brothers and sisters in Christ. And Christ be with you.

    Soli Deo Gloria
  • Mary
    Yes, it is truly amazing...I have a 7th grade daughter (I homeschool, for obvious reasons!) and her friends at CHURCH are reading Twilight. The high school group has a problem with kids smoking flavored tobacco from middle eastern pipe-like devices. I think the blame lies in other places than the culture, even though that is the major influence. The blame should be put squarely on the shoulders of the church and the parents. So many families are more concerned that their child be dressed in the latest fashions and have the latest "toys" than making sure they are grounded in God's Word. And the church is so afraid they are going to "offend" someone that they don't deliver the TRUTH with power and authority. It is truly sad. I pray to God that my daughter will live through her youth with her devotion to God and her faith intact. I placed her in God's hands at her birth. Praise God, she is still there...
  • truemethodistpastor
    Ingrid
    I so agree with you on many levels. As the parent of a 14yr old dauther and an 11 year old son I struggle with this issue daily. John Wesley talked about living holy lives before God. Holiness is almost totally missing from our mainline and evangelical vocabulary anymore. It it is mentioned it is used totally out of context. Wesley wasn't in anyway promoting works oriented salvation when he spoke about holiness he was talking about loving Jesus Christ by the way we live. When we love God with all of our hearts, minds, and bodies then and only then will we live out or faith in the world. I teach my middle schoolers that if they truly love God they will love what he loves and hate what he hates.
    My children go to public school and tell their friends on a daily bases that they don't want to hear about twilight, or the garbage music that so many of their "Christian" friends listen to.
    On of the best complements I recieved last week from the parent of one of my sons friends was, "My daughter says that your son is the only boy in his class that doesn's swear or use foul language in his class." That came from a parent who doesn't attend church but hopefully through the power of the Holy Spirt and our witness will some day come to know Christ.
    We can't totally shield our children from the world but we can be examples of how to love Jesus with all of our hearts, minds and bodies. When we do that, God honors our prayers and protects our children.
  • Dani
    But still the bible says, "Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it." Proverbs 22:6
    That word "train" is the missing link to godliness and we aren't comprehending all it entails.

    Another thing is to keep our children out of religious Babylon and secular Babylon, being in the world but not of it. The demonstrated power of God is also MIA in most homes. There's so many things wrong on so many levels in todays "Christianity".
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